This feels JUST like the last semester of high school in so many ways. Not college, high school. Why? (in no particular order)
- I will have to clean out my locker at the end of the year, and will probably select a nice-seeming underclassman to pass it down to.
- I am taking the most bullshit classes ever. (topics: not bullshit. paper I will write: also (hopefully) not bullshit. the fact of being there: total effing bullshit). It’s like U.S. Government (or govt’ (apostrophe outside the four letters, as it was in 1998-1999)).
- There are parties planned for the entire last month. Only this time I’m going to go to most of them, the cops probably won’t show up, and probably no one will throw a tire on a bonfire and ruin all the fun with toxic black smoke.
- My level of agitation with being in the same classes with the same 30-odd people has skyrocketed. I have little tolerance for the bullshit. People are publicly decompensating into high-pitched whining over things like “The jocks always get what they want.”
- We are scattering this summer, all over the country.
- We have plans to meet again next summer (for our actual graduation), but then we’re going to scatter again.
- A bunch of people are pregnant (though I think “who’s the father?” is a less interesting question this time around, and the pregnant girls are glowing instead of glowering.
- I am so ready to leave this place, and imagine all of my problems will be solved when I’m somewhere else (they won’t be).
- $20k sounds like a lot of money.
- No choosing of graduation colors, songs, flowers, bs, bs, bs.
- That last loan disbursement and the fear.
- I will really, really, really miss these people. Some of them.
- One of the first places I’m hoping to go when I’m done is home to my mom and dad for a long visit of the place I most wanted to leave 14 years ago (14!!).
- I don’t think anyone will question me about my faith in god in my community exit interview (I remember that, Mr. Postman, and it was not cool!)
- No prom.