Today I am… ridiculously tired. I haven’t slept to the alarm (6:30) once this week — today I came closest, at 6:00. Tuesday was the worst when I woke up at 3. Tomorrow I get to sleep in a little (leaving the house at 7:45), and I’m glad for that (hoping to make it to 7:00!). Thanks for this, Mom and Dad.

More: Here’s what’s going on with the date (I’m going to refer to him as the esquire from here on out). When I talk to people about the esquire, I get really excited. I had a great time. I like him. But then I read what I’ve written here, and it’s all very hesitant and disappointed. It’s not a perfect, together-forever thing. But it’s not as take-or-leave as I’m making it out to be. I think I’m playing it down out of fear that it won’t work out. I do this with a lot of things, and it prevents me from really being excited about anything. I hate that. I hope he calls. We would have fun.

Work is infinitely better this week, and I’m glad. I wasn’t very happy with it last week or the week before. This week, though, it’s good. Today there was one minor annoyance: I’m sharing a workstudy student with one of the professors, and the three of us (professor, student, and I) had a meeting today about what the student’s responsibilities would be. At one point the professor said something like, “Leslie, I hope I’m not offending you when I say this, but sometimes this work can get a little monotonous, so I’d like you [the student] to help me out with some more stimulating projects, too.” I was kind of offended, and probably moreso because she hoped she wasn’t offending me (and therefore knew she was?). Anyway, it’s true, some of my work can get monotonous, but it isn’t all monotonous. I learn a lot, I keep things flowing. I don’t know why her little comment bothered me so much. Maybe because it points out that, yes, my work is monotonous, and I don’t get to do any of the fun research, I just provide the images. And I know I’m really good at research, but I don’t think I ever want to be a professor. I don’t know…

So… I have zero plans for the weekend, and I’m kind of excited about that — I needed a weekend that was empty, and it’s now only a day away…


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